The river is within me. It is the life force that sustains me. For years...my grief, my rage, and other demons, kept the flow of my life force stagnant. It led me to some very dark and terrifying places. I didn't think I'd ever get off the merry-go-round of addiction and codependency. My PTSD was so severe I feared I'd never have a normal life...a life free of suicide attempts and overwhelming panic. But as I began the difficult work of healing and facing my demons, I came to see the value of having lived horrific life events. I truly believe that my life was spared, many times over, so that I could tell you my story. We are...all of us...here for a reason.